SCROLL—>  You are Supported More Than You Know, 2019, Mercury 20 Gallery, Oakland, CA

You are Supported More Than You Know, 2019, Mercury 20 Gallery, Oakland, CA

You are Supported More Than You Know, 2019, pillows, pillow cases, 144 x 24 x 14 inches

You are Supported More Than You Know is both the title of this exhibition at Mercury 20 Gallery in 2019 and the name of the sculptural pillow installation that spans the wall from floor to ceiling. The pillow is a means for support for one’s head and a metaphor for one’s dreams. There’s a bit of mystery in how it all works. The title comes from an understanding that when one decides to follow curiosity or pursue passion, the world opens up and offers a wealth of support. The stack of pillows is reminiscent of the Hans Christian Andersen tale, The Princess and the Pea. The princess gets her prince in the end but only in her courage to speak her truth.

Over One’s Head as performed by The Rub, 2019, (corner) wool and cashmere sweaters, polyester stuffing 81 x 24 x 40 inches

The Third Wheel, 2019, found wool and cashmere sweaters, dry cleaning bags, 16 x 21 x 17 inches

Conundra (001), 2019, sweater parts, stuffing, 8 x 4 x 4 inches

These previous three works speak of awkwardness or lack of understanding. Situated in a corner, the large unwieldy form, Over One’s Head as performed by The Rub represents a difficulty or obstacle. Originally situated atop a nightstand, The Rub now performs high above one’s head. The title is inspired by Hamlet’s soliloquy: Hamlet, Act III, Scene I excerpt (To be, or not to be):

To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
~William Shakespeare

You are Supported More Than You Know, 2019, Mercury 20 Gallery, Oakland, CA

Through Thick and Thin, 2018–2019, artist’s bedsheets, stuffing

It’s often not until my work is installed that I understand it more fully. Through Thick and Thin is a portrait of my marriage. The bedsheets speak of intimacy and their blue color is associated with faithfulness, depth and stability. Cut into narrow strips, sewn together and stuffed, the bedsheets become a bloated tube resembling entrails or the innermost part of something. Intestines are the part of the body most closely connected with intuition or inner knowing. The continuous line of fiber spans floor to ceiling forming u-shaped curves. As I cross the threshold of my height, I walk into an intimate space that separates me from the rest of the gallery. I am protected here and have the space I need.

Self-Portraits in the Age of Selfies, 2019, Mercury 20 Gallery, Oakland, CA

Loveworn, 2017–19, a favorite sweater of the artist, dustpan. photo: Mary Curtis Ratcliff

Loveworn (detail), 2017–2019, a favorite sweater of the artist

Pinned away from the wall, black strips of decayed material are loosely knitted together, forming a long narrow tapestry with gaping holes. Worn out, the fabric hangs by mere threads and tiny bits of material form a small pile in a dustpan on the floor.

Originally, this was a favorite sweater of mine, one I wore beyond its useful life. I remember buying the pullover in an upscale boutique but later upon looking at the tag, I discovered it was actually from J. Jill. Slightly surprised that I had conflated multiple experiences, I realize that my memory, like this material, is also subject to erosion over time.